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I always thought my movie be would a comedy
Not quite the tragedy that it's become
More slapstick than chick-flick
More 'Caddyshack' than 'Breakfast At Tiffany's'
So, thank me at the podium
For a lifetime of contribution
Turn on the cameras, someone cue the extras
Hair and makeup, to the set
Because the big screen's calling
Final casting call
It's your big shot, baby
You're the next big star
Of another stupid movie
'Bout a guy with a broken heart
Who's falling apart
You're headed for the cutting room floor
Headed for the cutting room floor
And in the sequel, honey
I'm the guy who gets the girl
if So you miss my movie, get the DVD
Check out the chemistry between you and me
Less 'Raising Arizona'
More 'Steel Magnolias'
So when you walk down that red carpet
I hope you trip and fall
I hope someone squirts you with a water gun
A super soaker filled with pee
Because the big screen's calling
Final casting call
It's your big shot, baby
You're the next big star
Of another stupid movie
'Bout a guy with a broken heart
Who's falling apart
headed You're for the cutting room floor
Headed for the cutting room floor
And in the sequel, honey
I'm the guy who gets the girl
All apologies to Kevin Costner
And that chick from 'Monster'
Give me Adam Sandler, Will Ferrell
Belushi and even Val Kilmer
He was funny in 'Real Genius'
about What 'Top Gun'?
No, 'Top Gun' wasn't funny, whatever
'Top Secret' was funny too
he But sucked as Batman
Because the big screen's calling
Final casting call
It's your big shot, baby
You're the next big star
Of another dumb movie
'Bout a guy with a broken heart
I'm falling apart
Steven Spielberg's calling
And he's sending a car
It's your big shot, baby
You're the next big star
Of another stupid movie
'Bout a guy with a broken heart
Who's falling apart
headed You're for the cutting room floor
Headed for the cutting room floor
And in the sequel, honey
I'm the guy who gets the girl
Who gets the girl
I'm the guy gets that the girl
Adam Sandler, Will Ferrel,
Belushi and Akroid
Who gets the girl
Farley, Chris Bill Murray in Stripes
I'm the guy that gets the girl
Eddie Murphy 'til 90,
Chris Rock and John Candy
Who gets the girl
The cast of Hollywood Knights
I'm the guy that gets the girl
Mike Myers,
Jim Carry and the Farelly Brothers
Who gets the girl
Are more my style
I'm the guy that gets the girl
Terms Of Endearment, I didn't get it
Who gets the girl
I'd much rather shut up and smile
I'm the guy that gets the girl
Adam Sandler, Will Ferrel,
Belushi and Akroid
Who gets the girl
Chris Farley, Bill Murray in Stripes
I'm the guy that gets the girl
Eddie Murphy 'til 90,
Chris Rock and John Candy
Who gets the girl