โหลดเพลง mp3 Ernie (The Fastest Milkman In The West) - Top of the Poppers

Ernie (The Fastest Milkman In The West) - Top of the Poppers
You could hear the hoof beats pound
As they raced across the ground

And the clatter of the wheels

As they spun round and round

And he galloped into Market Street
His badge upon his chest
His name was Ernie
And he drove the fastest
Milkcart in the west

Now Ernie loved a widow

A lady known as Sue

She lived all alone in Linley Lane
At number twenty two

They said she was too good for him
She was haughty proud and chic

But Ernie got his cocoa there
Three times every week

They called him Ernie (Ernie)

And he drove the fastest
Milkcart in the west

She said she'd like to bathe in milk
He said alright sweetheart

And when he finished work one night
He loaded up the cart

He said you wanted pasturised
Coz pasturised is best

She says Ernie I'll be happy
If it comes up to me chest

And that tickled old Ernie (Ernie)

And he drove the fastest milkcart
In the west

Now Ernie had a rival

An evil looking man

Called Two Ton Ted from Teddington
And he drove the baker's van

He tempted her with his treacle tarts
And his tasty wholemeal bread
And when she saw the size
Of his hot meat pies
It very near turned her head

She nearly swooned at his macaroon
And he said now if you treat me right
You'll have hot rolls evry morning
And crumpets every night

He knew once she'd sampled his layer cake
He'd have his wicked way
And all Ernie had to offer

Was a pint of milk a day

Poor Ernie (Ernie)

And he drove the fastest milkcart in the west

One lunchtime Ted saw Ernie's horse
And cart outside her door
It drove him mad to find
It was still there at half past four
And as he leaped down from of his van
Hot blood through his veins did course
And he went across to Ernie's cart
And he didn't half kick his horse

Who's name was Trigger (Trigger)

And he pulled the fastest milkcart in the west

Now Ernie rushed out into the street
His goldtop in his hand

He said if you want to marry Susie
You'll fight for her like a man
Oh why don't we play cards for her
He sneeringly replied

And just to make it interesting
We'll have a shilling on the side

Now Ernie dragged him from his van
And beneath the blazing sun

They stood there face to face
And Ted went for his bun

But Ernie was to quick
Things didn't go the way Ted planned
And a strawberry flavoured youghurt
Sent it spinning from his hand

Now Sue she ran between them
And tried to keep them apart

And Ernie pushed her aside
And a rock cake caught
Him underneath his heart
And he looked up in pained surprise
As the concrete hardened crust

Of a stale pork pie caught him in the eye
And Ernie bit the dust

Poor Ernie (Ernie)

And he drove the fastest milkcart in the west

Ernie was only fifty-two he didn't want to die

Now he's gone to make deliveries
In that milkround in the sky

Where the customers are angels
And ferocious dogs are banned

And a milkman's life is full of fun
In that fairy dairy land

But a woman's needs are manifold
And Sue she married Ted

But strange things happened
On their wedding night
As they lay in their bed

Was that the trees a rustling
Or the hinges of the gate

Or Ernie's ghostly goldtops

A rattling in their crate

They won't forget Ernie (Ernie)

And he drove the fastest milkcart in the west